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 20 Ways to Confuse Santa Claus




 1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.




 2. While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket.




 3. Leave him a note, explaining that you've gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants.




 4. While he's in the house, replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to get them to fly.




 5. Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big, red Santa suit!




 6. Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the roof, holding signs that say "We hate Christmas," and "Go away Santa."




  7. Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home.




 8. Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until the strippers arrive.




 9. While he's in the house, find the sleigh and sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that last payment, and take off.




  10. Leave a plate filled with cookies and a glass of milk out, with a note that says, "For The Tooth Fairy. :-)" Leave another plate out with half a stale cookie and a few drops of skim milk in a dirty glass with a note that says, "For Santa. :-("




  11. Take everything out of your house as if it's just been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed like a policeman and say, "Well, well. They always return to the scene of the crime."




  12. Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-minute changes and corrections.




  13. While he's in the house, cover the top of the chimney with barbed wire.




  14. Leave lots of hunting trophies and guns out where Santa's sure to see them. Go outside, yell, "Ooh! Look! A deer! And he's got a red nose!" and fire a gun.




 15. Leave Santa a note, explaining that you've moved. Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read directions to your new house.




  16. Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney. Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then explain that you're sorry, but from a distance, he looked like a bear.




  17. Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill.




  18. Paint "hoof-prints" all over your face and clothes. While he's in the house, go out on the roof. When he comes back up, act like you've been "trampled." Threaten to sue.




 19. Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with Easter eggs.




  20. Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa to come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big enough for the both of us."



Merry Christmas  and a  Happy New Year

Afrikaans - een plesierige kerfees ;   Albanian - Gezur Krislinjden ;   Arabic - i'd miilad said oua sana saida ;   Argentine - Felices Pasquas Y felices ano Nuevo ;   Armenian - Shenoraavor Nor Dari yev Pari Gaghand ;   Azeri - Tezze Iliniz Yahsi Olsun ;   Basque - Zorionak eta Urte Berri On! ;   Bohemian - Vesele Vanoce ;   Brazilian - Boas Festas e Feliz Ano Novo ;   Breton - Nedeleg laouen na bloavezh mat ;   Bulgarian - Tchestita Koleda; Tchestito Rojdestvo Hristovo ;   Catalan - Bon Nadal i Feliç Any Nou ;   Chinese (Mandarin) - Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan ;   Chinese (Cantonese) - Gun Tso Sun Tan'Gung Haw Sun ;   Cornish - Nadelik looan na looan blethen noweth ;   Cree - Mitho Makosi Kesikansi ;   Croatian - Sretan Bozic ;   Czech - Prejeme Vam Vesele Vanoce a stastny Novy Rok ;   Danish - Glædelig Jul ;   Dutch - Vrolijk Kerstfeest en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar! ;   English - Merry Christmas ;   Eritrean - rehus-beal-ledeat ;   Esperanto - Gajan Kristnaskon ;   Estonian - Ruumsaid juulup|hi ;   Farsi - Cristmas-e-shoma mobarak bashad ;   Finnish - Hyvaa joulua ;   French - Joyeux Noel   Frisian - Noflike Krystdagen en in protte Lok en Seine yn it Nije Jier! ;   German - Froehliche Weihnachten ;   Greek - Kala Christouyenna! ;   Hawaiian - Mele Kalikimaka ;   Hebrew - Mo'adim Lesimkha.Chena tova ;   Hindi - Shub Naya Baras ;   Hungarian - Kellemes Karacsonyi unnepeket ;   Icelandic - Gledileg Jol ;   Indonesian - Selamat Hari Natal ;   Iraqi - Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah ;   Irish - Nollaig Shona Dhuit ;   Iroquois Indian - Ojenyunyat Sungwiyadeson honungradon nagwutut. Ojenyunyat osrasay. ;  Italian - Buone Feste Natalizie ;   Japanese - Shinnen omedeto. Kurisumasu Omedeto ;   Korean - Sung Tan Chuk Ha ;   Latvian - Prieci'gus Ziemsve'tkus un Laimi'gu Jauno Gadu! ;   Lettish - Priecigus Ziemassvetkus ;  Lithuanian - Linksmu Kaledu ;   Manx - Nollick ghennal as blein vie noa ;   Maori - Meri Kirihimete ;   Maltese - Il-Milied it-tajjeb ;   Marathi - Shub Naya Varsh ;   Navajo Indian- Merry Keshmish ;   Norwegian - God Jul ;   Papiamento - Un Felis Pasco y un Prospero Anja Nobo ;   Papua New Guinea - Bikpela hamamas blong dispela Krismas na Nupela yia i go long yu. ;   Pennsylvania German - En frehlicher Grischtdaag un en hallich Nei Yaahr! ;   Polish - Wesolych Swiat Bozego Narodzenia ;   Portuguese - Boas Festas ;   Rapa-Nui - Mata-Ki-Te-Rangi. Te-Pito-O-Te-Henua ;   Rumanian - Sarbatori vesele ;   Russian - Pozdrevlyayu s prazdnikom Rozhdestva is Novim Godom ;   Serbian - Hristos se rodi ;   Slovakian - Sretan Bozic or Vesele vianoce ;   Sami - Buorrit Juovllat ;   Samoan - La Maunia Le Kilisimasi Ma Le Tausaga Fou ;   Scots Gaelic - Nollaig chridheil huibh ;   Serb-Croatian - Sretam Bozic. Vesela Nova Godina ;   Singhalese - Subha nath thalak Vewa. Subha Aluth Awrudhak Vewa ;   Slovak - Vesele Vianoce. A stastlivy Novy Rok ;   Slovene - Vesele Bozicne. Screcno Novo Leto ;   Spanish - Feliz Navidad ;   Swedish - God Jul and (Och) Ett Gott Nytt År ;   Tagalog (Filipino) - Maligayamg Pasko. Masaganang Bagong Taon ;   Tamil - Nathar Puthu Varuda Valthukkal ;   Thai - Sawadee Pee Mai ;   Turkish - Noeliniz Ve Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun ;   Ukrainian - Srozhdestvom Kristovym ;   Urdu - Naya Saal Mubarak Ho ;   Vietnamese - Chung Mung Giang Sinh ;   Welsh - Nadolig Llawen ;   Yugoslavian - Cestitamo Bozic




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