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12 Promises for Beginners

1.    You will know your full name and address.
2.    You will be able to shave yourself, or put on your makeup, whichever pleases you.
3.    You will be able to dress and undress yourself.
4.    You will know the town, the state, and the country you live in.
5.    You will be able to find socks that match, or nylons without runs.
6.    You will be able to smoke without burning yourself, your clothes, or the furniture.
7.    You will lose the fear of food.
8.    You will be able to walk a straight line and pass the drunk driving test.
9.    You will spend less time in the bathroom and be able to brush your teeth without gagging
10.  You will lose the fear of police cars.
11.  You will be able to answer the door without having to look through the peephole.
12.  You will realize what a hell of a mess you were, and thank God, or your HP for AA.

Attitude is Everything

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